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Friday, 19 August 2016

The cwosson

At till in front of me in Lidl. Woman and toddler. Empty bakery wrapper on scanner.

Lidl guy looks puzzled.

Woman: "There was a croissant (pronounced cwosson) in that. My daughter was very very peckish. She ate the cwosson.

Lidl guy: Grand. Sound job.

Child: But mummy it's empty. The croissant is gone mummy.

Woman: But you DID have a cwosson darling and we must pay for the delicious cwosson. Say thanks to the nice man for the delicious cwosson darling.

Child: Thanks Mister.

Lidl guy: You're grand. Sound.
(Translation: Tell your mother get over herself and move along. There are other people waiting.

Woman: Say goodbye to the nice man darling.

Child: No.

Woman: Say goodbye darling.

Child: Goodbye darling.

Guy: Sound. You're grand.

Woman: Hurry now darling. Mummy must get on.

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